As a whole, I thought this was a good "cliff hanger" episode. It didn't leave me hanging on, mouth wide open in surprise, like the season finale with Chuck left for dead in the street... but it will keep my interest in the show for a month, which was probably the point.Ben there, done that: (Am I the only one who, after seeing this picture, thought he was a priest? I am? Okay, moving on.) So they never sealed the deal; he was still acting super inappropriate with a student. Should it have warranted jail time? Doubt it. But he definitely shouldn’t have been teaching anymore. I just refuse to accept that Serena is some Helen of Troy that entrances men into giving up everything they have ever cared about. Her little, “He’s the only man that has ever turned me down,” line made me about vomit. I searched through my memory of GG trying to prove her wrong. Okay, so yeah, maybe he is. But what are we supposed to think? Kudos to Ben for not being a pedophile? This wasn’t last summer. She wasn’t a freshman in college. If I’m doing the math right, she was, what, 16? They shouldn’t have been driving to libraries or whatever it is they were doing. And it is insulting, to me as a viewer, that the writers keep forcing this Academic Career of Serena’s. I refuse to believe that she went from inventing drinks and getting smashed in the middle of the day, to visiting libraries, in what? A day? A week? Come on. Serena has an Academic Career as much as I have a Tennis Career. And I’ve only won one tennis match in my life. When my opponent didn’t show.
Regarding Serena: I have always been more Team Blair, than Team Serena, so this should come as no surprise: Serena gets on my nerves. In real life, I love Blake Lively; she's chill, gorgeous, and a pretty good actress. But I cannot stand Serena 90% of the time. She seems to be aloof and a tad too self assured. Of course, Serena is just as gorgeous as Blake, obviously, but S has this attitude of, “everyone always assumes the worst about me and I don’t know why.” Well, I know why- Because by the age of 16 you were a mini Tara Reid, running around Manhattan in designer gowns and flasks full of Courvoisier, taking V-cards and murdering drug dealers. One stint at a boarding school and a couple of studious boyfriends does not a “good girl” make. Not to mention, now that we have flash backed to her days at Cornwall, we know she wasn’t reformed by going to boarding school. If watching a man die at your hands, even if unintentionally, and even if he was a pretty sleazy guy to begin with, doesn’t end Party Time, then I would probably be on the “Serena Will Never Change” bandwagon, too. So, we are so sorry Princess Serena. We do assume the worst. But most of the time we are correct.
Regarding Serena: I have always been more Team Blair, than Team Serena, so this should come as no surprise: Serena gets on my nerves. In real life, I love Blake Lively; she's chill, gorgeous, and a pretty good actress. But I cannot stand Serena 90% of the time. She seems to be aloof and a tad too self assured. Of course, Serena is just as gorgeous as Blake, obviously, but S has this attitude of, “everyone always assumes the worst about me and I don’t know why.” Well, I know why- Because by the age of 16 you were a mini Tara Reid, running around Manhattan in designer gowns and flasks full of Courvoisier, taking V-cards and murdering drug dealers. One stint at a boarding school and a couple of studious boyfriends does not a “good girl” make. Not to mention, now that we have flash backed to her days at Cornwall, we know she wasn’t reformed by going to boarding school. If watching a man die at your hands, even if unintentionally, and even if he was a pretty sleazy guy to begin with, doesn’t end Party Time, then I would probably be on the “Serena Will Never Change” bandwagon, too. So, we are so sorry Princess Serena. We do assume the worst. But most of the time we are correct.
Rufus, you keep your mouth shut and bring me a scotch: Wow. Rufus is a wussy. Yeah, Lily is an all around bad person, but I was more turned off by Rufus’ tattling. For those that need a recap: Three years ago, Lily forged Serena’s signature on an affidavit (someone is losing their Notary stamp), thus sending a man to prison for statutory rape. And recently, she has made plans to sell Bass Industries, without telling the only heir (Chuck). However, the line of the night, for me, came from Mrs. Van der Woodson Bass Humphrey herself: When Wimpy Rufus said “Don’t you have something to tell Chuck?” and Lily responds with, “If I had something I wanted Chuck to know, I would have told him.” It was very deliciously evil, and it just slapped that little househusband in the FACE! Rufus was annoying this whole episode- questioning Lily’s drinking habits (albeit was hardly noon), and then going over her head to call her out in front of Chuck… has the phrase, “Can I talk to you in private?” never been uttered on the UES? What if she had some awesome plan that was going to help Chuck? What if it had been Chuck’s idea? Sheesh, Rufie, way to be a baby.
Good Luck Chuck: This kid cannot catch a break. First, his dad berates him his whole life. Then, Jack tries to steal the hotel and his girl. His momma lies and leaves him. And now Lily has betrayed him. I know he is going to New Zealand to find Uncle Jack, and I am wondering what that will bring with it. But overall, there was not a lot of Chuck Bass in this episode, and we need to make sure that doesn’t happen again.
NAiveTŠ€: Bless him. The boy has a heart of gold, but a brain of… well gold, but only because it is the most malleable element. The only thing that is harder to believe than Serena being concerned about her Academic Career is the fact that this Golden Boy doesn’t still believe in Santa. I get whiplash every episode trying to keep up with which side of an issue Nate is on; he switches teams (and I’m not referring to his relationship with Dan) with every new piece of info. Then, finally, but only after his mother all but says, “I am shallow, let it go,” he sides with the Commander or Captain or whatever pseudo-military nickname they call Mr. Archibald, and they plan to move into The Empire. I’m not sure who his parole officer is, but I can’t imagine living in Chuck Bass’s man cave is on any list of acceptable housing.
Do We Dair?: Dan and Blair? Is this going to happen? Would Chuck be more offended by this, or the Blair/Jack tryst that STILL hasn’t come out? I love Blair and Dan’s chemistry, but I don’t know that it would translate into a romance. Their road trip was wonderful, and I was cracking up at Damian riding in the backseat, while they were only talking to each other. However, their relationship hinges on loathing and judgment, so I can’t see how it would work if those were removed. Could it be just a “non-friends” with benefits? Maybe. But love? No. This is what I am most looking forward to in the New Year.
Great Lines:
"I wouldn't know how to feel. I would never do something like that." Worst Therapist Ever
“So long, friends. Dan.” Chuck Bass
“Eric, somewhere between a Marlins jersey and the absolute truth lies the better part of decorum.” Lily van der Woodson Bass Humphrey
“That's why we're going to end this experiment in middle class living and then call the housekeeper to clean up.” Nate Archibald
“I'm out buying you some new clothes. I know you've been locked away for awhile, but no one's wearing orange this season.” Nate Archibald
“You can't show up at a masked ball and not expect at least one social climbing doppelganger to try and impersonate you.” Blair Waldorf
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