To the guy that sits beside me...

You can say "phew" as many times and as loudly as you want.

I will never ask you what happened.

First Quarter 2011

I don't make New Year's Resolutions.

I understand my limits, and I acknowledge that I won't stick with it for more than a month.

So, I make a resolution each month.

These were my resolutions, and the outcome of such, for the first quarter of 2011.

January: Cut Back on Celebrity Gossip

Note that this says Celebrity Gossip and not Celebrity News. I still enjoy reading stories of who got married or divorced, or who had a baby... or especially who died (I know, issues). But I was tired of reading all the stories that I knew were probably false, however juicy they may be. I completed this resolution by deleting my subscription to Perez Hilton's blog. There is no telling how much time and energy I wasted reading that mean man's opinion of celebrities. The thing was, I didn't like or agree with 90% of what he said, but I had gotten addicted to reading and knowing everything that was out there, no matter the source. I decided that the wanting to know wasn't necessarily the problem, but I had to watch where I was getting my fix. I now only read more reputable and positive websites. Deleting that negativity that comes from reading a grown man call a woman fat or draw lude pictures on a man's face... I can't tell you how much lighter my RSS Feed has gotten :)

February: Engage in Conversation with Other People

I hate conversing with other people. Now, don't get me wrong, I could sit and talk to my friends for hours... but strangers? No. Acquaintances? Even worse, because they expect you to actually care. I chose this resolution for February because it is the shortest month and I needed to save those 2 or 3 extra days for something I could actually stand. I resolved to respond and engage with every person that spoke to me for this entire month. When someone says, "Hey, how are you?" I usually say, "Fine." That's it. No, "Fine, how are you?" just "Fine." And let me tell you, you're lucky you get those 4 little letters. I will walk 5 minutes out of my way to avoid a conversation. It makes me nervous and uncomfortable to have to make conversation, so I promised myself that I would start small and simply return greetings and ask about people's general state of being... in person and on Facebook. So I Hey'd and Hi'd my way through half the month just fine... and then I realized what a grievous error I had made. My birthday falls right in the middle of the month of February, and it was on a Sunday this year. Which meant that I would be at church for 6 hours, with at least 200 people that usually speak to me, and they would ALL speak because it was my freaking birthday... not to mention the random weirdos that I had to say Thank-you-how-are-you to on Facebook (why do you wish random people happy birthday?). So I took a deep breath and Thank-you-How-are-you-doing'ed my way through my whole birthday, and I will say... after the day was over, I felt more social than the rest of my life combined.

March: Floss Every Day

More than anything else, this was decided because I had a dentist appointment at the beginning of March. But it is something we should all do, and it is something that I detest doing. After begging my dental hygienist to give up all hopes of me actually flossing, she granted me her blessing on using those little slingshot looking flossers. I told her I could do that. So, I resolved to do so every day for the month of March, and I did. I actually don't mind doing it at all, since I don't have to actually use the string of floss and stick my hands in my mouth. I realize that after January and February's Make-Me-A-Better-Person resolutions, this one seems trivial, but there are only so many character flaws that I am actually willing to change.

You know what is hilarious....

Laughing at a Fat Booth photo on Facebook.

And then realizing it is real.

Calm Down and Get Straight

I don't know if anyone is reading this... and I don't know if of the maybe 2 people that are, either have ever seen Little Shop of Horrors (the movie)... but there is a part in that movie where Audrey and Seymour are singing their little hearts out to each other in the alley... and Bill Murray's character walks in and says, "Excuse me, but if you two kids could just stop singing for one minute..."

Well, that is how I felt from 8pm-9pm last night while I was watching Grey's Anatomy: Song Beneath the Song.

Honestly, I don't even know where, or how, to begin. I'll start with a positive: Callie has an amazing voice... and the fact that she was in limbo or brain damaged or just punch drunk with love for Arizona, kind of made her singing seem appropriate. I laughed, I will admit, with the first note that was sung... but I could at least distend belief long enough to let her finish a song. Because she wasn't singing TO anyone, she was just putting her thoughts to songs she'd heard. Or some crazy bull mess that makes no sense. Whatever. It's the only positive I have.

Now, on to the best parts... Let's approach this like a true musical. By numbers. (but only those that made a lasting impression on me... and by that, I mean the bad ones.)

Chasing Cars... by Hunt, Torres, and Bailey

I can't remember what was happening on the episode that this song was originally played, but I do remember that I went and illegally downloaded Chasing Cars that same night. So, I can concede the point that Grey's has done big things for music... but still, it does not justify a musical! Dr. Hunt was the kicker for me. When he was looking at Callie, and just started singing, so intensely, the second verse... I lost it. I mean, I literally lost it. I, all at once, had to cover my eyes and my mouth, as I was about to spit water all over myself and everything in a 3 foot radius. There was no way I could be legitimately concerned for Callie's life, or that of her baby, because I was too busy cracking up at how seriously he was taking this nonsense.

Breathe... by Lexie

Considering this song is about, first, a girl going to get an abortion, and second, a young alcoholic soldier... I didn't get the connection. Were they trying to pull in every song that had ever been played on all 7 seasons? I understood that people did need to "just breathe," but I did not particularly love Lexie's voice (and she's been my favorite character since she came on the show), and I definitely thought it was a bit extreme that Callie was imagining Lexie walking down the hall singing Anna Nalick while she ripped her surgical mask off. This was my first "what the H is going on" moment.

Running on Sunshine... pretty much everyone, except McDreamy because he has a brain.

This. Was. Ridiculous. First of all, isn't everyone supposed to be super worried about their friend and her baby? Yet, Teddy is flirting it up with her patient/husband while he sings about a "rocket in his front left pocket." Is this an April Fools joke? Bailey and her nurse lover are bantering about getting it on in the hallway, and Karev is throwing the OBGYN around his trailer. My bad... I thought maybe the gyno should be with her patient that is minutes from death. The only scene in this song that seemed anywhere near appropriate was Meredith and McDreamy. He at least made a point to let the audience know that he was still thinking about Callie, and not his next solo. But that is because Patrick Dempsey is a genius and opted out of all musical numbers. When a man that had the lead in Enchanted tells you that a musical is not a good idea, maybe listen.

How to Save a Life... by Torres and others (can only remember one part of it)

This was okay. I liked how Callie was in the observation deck (or whatever it is called) with her baby daddy and lesbian lover. It was as if she was singing TO them, and that made semi-sense to me. Ok, that's all for that one.

How We Operate... by Hunt

Another one that had me burying my face out of embarrassment. I can't tell if it is because I don't like Hunt in the first place, or that he sings like he is delivering marching orders for a brigade, but I was physically uncomfortable every time the focus was on him. All the attendings are discussing literal life-and-death matters, and out of the blue (which, I will admit, I should have been expecting by now), Hunt sings "calm down, and get straight" (and don't think the irony of him saying that to Arizona was lost on me), and then he just lets loose. I hope when he wrote that song, Gomez knew the medical treatment that Callie would need... because it became apparent that it was the only direction that any of her doctors would be receiving.

Were you a fan of the music event? Or has Grey's Anatomy jumped the shark?